想念一个人的时候

i stayed at home again.

due to the price increased in petrol, i tend to stay at home and try not to use so much of petrol by going anywhere. this included finding him for lunch. ='(

what to do? i stay so far, which is real far to One U. not like staying at P.J. that's convenience.

i thought about him so much today. not that he is the only one that living in my world now. being together so long, everyday is like a beginning of us for me. wondered why.

i love seeing him smiles. as he didn't smile as much as he does now. his smile is so cute. =)

why didn't he smile this much last time? i mean before i knew him or after i knew him. don't know. he told me he changed because of me, which i made him smile. and gradually changing more.

in this so-free-day, i was thinking a lot about us too.

how we knew each other, what was his first sentence said to me, how was he looked compared now, gifts he gave me, first time holding hands, first time hugged, first time kissed, first time came to my house, first time seeing my parents, etc. damn many la.

feelings never change. i love to be with him thou. he makes me feel secure. definitely not because he have a wider shoulder than anyone else. haha. things that he did, just make me feel safe. =)

sometimes, i wonder without him, how my life would be.

i did realized my life was fine without him before. if now; a big IF, i have to live without him, it will be fine too right? but memories are memories. it will store in our mind and make us think of it sometimes. it's kinda sad.

i don't want to. so, i choose to stick with him no matter what. =)

of course unless he 'bao yi lai' or become gay or whatever shit it is. then i don't want him for sure. hehe